FT brothers scoop their own scoop

Those nice chaps at the Financial Times can only be pushed so far.
Like BA staff, there is a day of action today and a picket (at the FT!). The National Union of Journalists are outside the building, in the snow, and meeting inside to discuss "Unsafe and Unprofessional workloads" says my spy.
The NUJ are also handing out flyers, the highlight of which is this: "Lloyd Blankfein, the Goldman Sachs boss and the FT's 'Person of the Year' is not the only doing God's work - so are FT journalists inproducing premium products for a discerning audience."
A slight problem is that the NUJ staffers have broken an embargo, because the great vampire squid himself has not actually been named Person of the Year by the FT, yet.
Whoops.

Kafka on trial

Goldman Sachs's London spinmeister, Paul Kafka, is gamely persevering with his ambitious project designed to make his banking overlords appear more humane.
Vice chairman "Fat Mike" Sherwood - who likes to wear a personalised tracksuit while playing ping pong - used The Times's opinion pages last month to preach to ungrateful readers how Goldman's clients selflessly grow "the savings of millions of people".
Then chief exec Lloyd Blankfein joined the crusade, telling the Sunday Times how he and his disciples are merely performing "God's work".
And, today, the Holy Trinity was completed with chief economist, Jim O'Neill, popping in to give the economic sermon in the Evening Standard.
For some reason, Jim got slightly distracted and waffled on a touch about a trip to China with the missus, but was soon back on message to namecheck his ultimate master.
He argued the credit crisis was "an act of God" for China, before signing off with a quick "thank God for the English language".
After all that, any sane soul would now recognise it's time for Kafka to revert to type and impose a vow of silence. But, like much of his namesake Franz's work, City wags fear his shameless publicity project remains unfinished.

Blankcheque threads his way through the eye of a needle

Goldman Sachs boss Lloyd Blankcheque says that he's doing "God's work" impersonating a great vampire squid. But which God?
Blankfein is, himself, Jewish, but is not adverse to schmoozing those with lines into the other major religious brands.
On Pope Benedict's trip to the US last year, His Excellency dropped in for the first ever papal visit to a US synagogue and met Jewish "leaders" including private-equity billionaire Stephen Schwarzman as well as the Goldman boss.
So, is Blankfein hedging his bets?

Lucas spins right round

Goldman Sachs spinner-in-chief, Lucas van Praag, has never been this dizzy.
As the attacks on the bank pour in from publications both thoughtful (Rolling Stone) and wild-eyed (Wall Street Journal), van Praag is working double-time to keep the critics in line.
Not surprising then, that he may have appeared to contradict himself on occasion, as he tries to explain why Goldman is not actually to blame for everything from swine flu to global warming.
Sometimes, in trying to explain the unique culture of the bank which makes it so successful (it's definitely the "culture", not the government bailouts) he describes a place where ideas spring forth from bright individuals who are encouraged to speak out:
"In some other firms, nobody disagrees with the boss. Lloyd Blankfein would say that's not a luxury he enjoys," he offers to The Daily Telegraph.
On other occasions, he reckons instead that the secret is the fact that Goldmonites are a bunch of drones who all think and act alike.
"The cult of the individual, which I think has been a disadvantage to so many of the firm's competitors, really doesn't exist here," he tries.
Well, which way round is it, old son?